Funeral to Wedding

Here is the pic of the coconut hut girl- this is here bedroom and market stand! The other pics are the kids at MCC- I have like 100 photos so I'll just throw a couple up for you to see how CUTE they are! The girl on the right is Sarah, my friend Shanu's neice. They wear the Swedish colours because that is who funds them.

My new place is very good. They even bought me toilet paper which was really sweet. I'm still getting fed for all my meals. If I don't bring a lunch the girls feed me. It might seem rude in Canada that they are all grabing the rice and fish from each others plates and giving it to me but I like the unity of it. The number one question I get asked is "breakfast?" or "lunch?" They are asking if I've had it because if not they want to feed me right then and there.
Another question that comes up upon introduction is "brothers, sisters?" It is part of their introduction... Mage nama Angela, Mama Nangi (younger sister). The older girls actually call me Nangi and the younger, Akka, when they are not calling me Ms. Angeline, Angie or sudunoona. Haha, they haven't quite put thier finger on Angela.
I am going to a funeral today with Amma- a friend she went to school with died from cancer. I suspect it will be very different from our funerals- more of a celebration. They seem to accept death differently. Like when Conrad was telling me about the day after the tsunami when he went looking for Sri Pauli (eomployee and teacher) he said there were dead bodies everywhere, and he was chuckling? It's the reincarnation thing I guess. Anyway, I can tell you more about the funeral later.
I might also get to go to a wedding on March 8 if I don't have to stay here for the International Women's Day party! Woot woot! I'm going to see if Andy can come, too, because it is at the Galle Face Hotel in Colombo. Amma is getting a sari made for me.

Still taking pictures, even when lost

Haha, so it was my first day walking today and being that I was on the other side of the street and trying to avoid eye contact, tuk tuks and rabie dogs, I walked right past my turn off.
I started to notice that things weren't looking right but I kept walking until I saw a lady. She got her daughter to come out of their coconut stand and she knew a little English. Not enough though! So I called Nilu, my new house Amma, and she called her husband and he called me back, etc. The girl told him where I was and he called the office to send me Wasantha and the tuk-tuk. The girl invited my inside her shack/bedroom/store and offered me a seat.
When I got to INDECOS I was about an hour late and all the girls were stressing out. They were all crowded around waiting to see that I was ok and I got scolded for not wearing a watch. Haha. They found it particularly funny that while everyone was so worried I was just hanging out conversing with this 16 year-old and I had taken the picture to prove it.
I'm going to print the picture and take it to the girl with a granola bar or clothes or something to say thanks becuase as I left she asked "you come back, no?"
I'm telling you, this is how welcoming these Sri Lankans are! It's crazy.
Anyway, I should get back to work. It's only across the street so hopefully I can find it.

New house & other random ramblings

I've moved into my new house now. As everyone told me, the people are just as welcoming as Conrad & Pearl and the place is fantastic. There English is not as good so I am having to use even simpler words and talking even slower- not an easy task for me! But, at least they pretend to understand, bobbing there heads from side to side (which can symbolize "yes," or "I don't want to say no so I will just do this."). It can be very confusing. They do not have internet but this cafe is literally across the street from the office and I always keep busy anyway.
I have the upstairs suite to myself including a fridge, a rooftop and clean bathroom- in my last place I was geeting used to stepping on the unavoidable ants crawling all over the floor because it's rude to wear shoes. Sometimes I'd sneak them in under my towel though. I love the not wearing shoes thing because when it's hot and you have to keep so much skin covered you need something to be free.
I'm finding my style here though- learning what is acceptable and what you'll get you some strange looks. It turns out that the rules are more lenient than I thought- they're just different. Tight shirts are fine, white shirts that you can see through are ok, even some shoulder is no problem, it's just the spagetti straps and short shorts/skirts that must be avoided. Pearl was laughing the other day when I was asking her about one of my shirts. "You tink too much" she said and she's probably right.
I was asking her all about her Buddhist beliefs last night. I was told ahead of time but still expected that the Buddism here would be more of a philosophy like in other parts of Asia but here it has really become a religion with rules and scripture and daily worshiping. Everywhere you go you here people thanking the Lord which I mentally associate with Christain thinking rather than Buddhist. There's no yoga here :( but I promised to teach Madhu and the other girls. I am also teaching them power point and presentation skills next week, and right now I am improving their brochures and writing a report about the Children's Center as it has now been open for 1 year. I was also asked to write a proposal to keep one of the women's entrepeneurial programs going for another year.
On Friday I'll be heading out with Conrad to a very remote willage to check out one of the education programs they have going on there. On Sunday I went to the environmental training but I found it very basic compared to what we learn- they learn about water and animals & such. The children are sooooooo studious. They listen carefully when the teacher is speaking and always, even if they see a teacher in town, they bow before them to worship.
Most of the girls want to become doctors. It's great that they are encouraged to go to school & study but it doesn't mean that they are equal- just means that families here can't survive on one income. I was asking Pearl about how if everyone looks well dressed and has food to eat what was poor and she said that poor meant that you could not afford "the good food or the education." I met someone the other day who dressed like they worked in an office in the West and had a new cell phone but when we dropped him at his house he lived in a tiny shack with several family members. Clearly, he is supporting his whole family with his job at INDECOS.
You are considered a girl here until you are about 25, so most of the employees at INDECOS are still "girls". For the most part they act very young, too, giggling a lot but also because they "obey" Conrad who they all call "the Mr." It is a patriarchy all the way and you have Muslim girls, who are not allowed to get educated, running training programs to do with education. The office setting is very different here and I am still trying to figure it out.

Brief Update

Hi there.

I am still loving it here. I'm actually getting to know the girls quite well which is cool and I will be moving into my new house tonight. This is good because I won't have to eat large amount of rice & curry three times a day including dinner which is usually around 9 or 10pm. Luckily the biggest meal is lunch! But I still usually sneak my plate out to the dogs to spare the Sri Lankan feelings.

Moving out is also sad though because Conrad and Pearl have been so fantastic. I promised I would come over on the weekends and such. But I always feel so bad because when the girls come over they work so hard around the house and I always ask but she always says nae. I figured out now why they were so family-like right away- yesterday Pearl told be that because they are Buddhist they believe we were together before the bird- (after about halk an hour, I figured out it were actually together before the "birth" not "bird").

Haha, she can't understand my accent either because she grew up in a Catholic convent with British teachers. We have quite the back and forth communication but at least she can speak English- with many others it is hard to get past the fact that "no I am not hungry" and "yes, I love Sri Lanka." Sometimes even that is hard to get across.

I haven't had to spend a cent on food. Not that I care though because everything is cheap. Have I expressed that enough? Four people can eat out for $2.00!

I actually just spoke with Harshani about extending my stay a week or so because I am supposed to fly out May 4 which is way too soon!

I order 200 cards so that I can attempt to fit them in my bag and I can order more in the future- it is so cheap to send.

Another bus bomb went off - in Mt. Lavinia where Andy and I were. 18 were injured but I don't think anyone died.

So much to stay, so sticky keyboad and slow connection

I'm in Matara now and feel like I am finally where I am supposed to be. Right now I am living with boss and wife. I didn't expect after one day I would be calling her Amma, mother, but this is how the culture works. The girls at INDECOS are so sweet, always giggling and very friendly. Love to practice English. But right now I am at the children's center, one of the INDECOS projects where Amma Pearl is boss. She would have only had to work for 2 more years with gov't to get pension but decided to do this instead.
All 15 pre-schoolers are very poor but you can't tell because they are all wearing uniforms & also because clothes are cheap here even poor people are dressed well. A blouse costs about a dollar or 2. Amma took me shopping yesterday and I got 3 long skirts and three blouses for about $30. All I would wear at home.
The children at the center are calling me suduakka, white sister. It is so sweet. They are all so tiny. The older children are very good at english and very smart. They have to keep good grades to get their scholarships from Sweden. Swedish girls came yesterday for a study & came over for dinner. Pearl and Conrad love to entertain! Actually, the working women cook here for about 2 hours in the morning, then work for 8 hours, then cook for another 2 at night, then maybe do housework. It brings new meaning to the concept of the woman's double burden when there are no pop tarts. Food for these people is so important and cooking & eating is such a huge part of their day! The girls from work will actually come over to help Pearl prepare though and sometimes sleep over.
It is so interesting to see how this org works. They eat together during the day and we have a tuk tuk & driver so that we are safe. I feel VERY (hari) safe here! But still, even living on a cinnamon farm out of town, I am not to answer the door and last night when Amma and I were talking and we heard noices she told me "Shhh... we must listen when noise. It's noting but tings happen in Sri Lanka." Generally, as long as I do not go anywhere along like the beach I will be safe because I have so many people around me. Plus, the average Sri Lankan is so kind. Sometimes they look mad but then I smile and they always smile back. I don't yet know how to read facial expressions.
The best was at the temple on Poya. The kids in particular would just stare at me in amazement- especially when I was worshipping. Apparently it was because many people would be coming from out of town & so they thought me white skin was magic! The temple was so beautiful.
I still have not been to the beach but driving down the coast was a beautiful ride and much less traffic than drive to Kandy.
I have seen the house I will live in and it is very nice. As usual, there is a fish pond in the entrance but the colours are exceptional- red, yellow, green. I will miss staying where I am but I promised to come for dinner a few nights a week.
As for work, I am learning to be a Mr.Slow. This is where my patience and being in the moment will be tested. Today, the work comp gave my laptop a virus through my flashdrive. I can't see my desktop anymore. Maybe I will have to reformat? Anyway, I have not gotten much accomplished in terms of the marketing material yet but that is ok because I am still getting to know about what the organizations are about anyway.
I can't wait to bring home my pamphlets because I think people will really want to donate to this cause!!! I was telling Conrad about how we donate to World Vision at Christmas and he was saying that he took a volunteer the child's house that they were donating to and found out the child recieved very little of the money. With this funding it goes directly to the poor child and there is constant checking to make sure the family is not using the money for anything but the education. Yesterday when the Swedish girls asked the kids what they wanted to do if they could do anything they all said either doctors or engineers and each one said to help their family!

Good-bye Andy... have fun in Kandy!

Well, today was the day we took Andy to Kandy.

Her bf was here so we spent the day being tourists and went to Mt. Lavinia. We were given the advice from our Sri Lankan friends to enter through a hotel so that we would be safer in the company of other tourists. We didn't fully grasp the importance of this until we entered through the hotel & came out on the locals side. I can tell you the stares that you get while in a locked SUV with a Sri Lankan as your driver are not easy enough to ignore but being two white blonde girls (and Dave) on the beach with 20 SL teenagers who think that white= Baywatch is another story.
We scurried over the rocks to the other side. where we found security guards watching the beach so that we did not have to worry about theft/harassment when they went swimming and left me alone or when I get swimming (undercurrent). The beach was beautiful and got melooking forward to Matara.
Dropping off Andy today, I got to check out her center & accommodations which look really great. Her apartment is huge- 2 bedrooms, 2 toilets, and a huge open front room & deck with a gorgeous view of the surrounding mountains. This apartment costs about $150 (and that is after inflation!)... I am so retiring here! Anyway, I hope that I can, at some point, visit her. Kandy is much cooler, much greener then where I will be going and where she will be living and working seems very safe, being outside of Kandy-town.
On the way home Harshani asked me if I wanted to stay for a year because there is a position open at the INDECOS office. I told her that it is tempting at this point but I think that the honeymoon phase I'm in could come to an end any day now, although I shouldn't manifest that. It's just that right now I am loving everything about this place. And it feels like the culture shock is not going to be in SL but in Canada when I get home and I am reminded that men don't hold hands and wear skirts; two cars normally pass on a 2 lane road, not 3, or even 4; babies & children are not normally held on the front of fast ridden motorbikes; and shoulders, knees, and body parts in general, are not hidden under layers of protection.
But the biggest culture shock that I will probably experience in Canada is that in a country one of your best advantages is being able to eat nearly ANYTHING in the world and we have somehow managed to come up with the idea of eating plastic (mayonaise) laden burgers. EW!
And worse, we spread this idea into these other countries like a fast spreading disease. India is actually becoming one of the biggest diabetic nations and I don't think this is from curry!
I already want to retreat back to Chilaw village and choose the floor for sleep and the sun for light so that I can eat fish, coconut, tomatoes, pineapple and greens and dance/laugh/sing year round.
Oh ya! So, I was talking to Harsh and I decided I am going to buy a ton of cards to help this community fund so email me if you want to buy any cards- they are paper mache with nice paper designs on them & cost about 50 cents each. I don't know how many to get... 100?200? 400? so I can gage it a bit if anyone shows interest. Or I can just use them as my seasonal for the rest of my life. They're really pretty and the cause itself should really make the most loyal brand monger want to see ya to Halmark!!! I'll explain the details more when I get home.

Chilaw, Wil Pother Village

I have been to so many place I’ve been has people so kind, cities so dynamic and beauty so diverse. I am in love with Sri Lanka! Best part of SL so far... two days in small house made of clay with no toilet or electricity in a village with even hotter & drier weather than Colombo.

After language training on Friday we headed out for our 2-4 hour drive to the village. (It is very hard to say how long a km will take here because of the insane traffic). Anyway, the ride was interesting because I got to see how big Colombo really was... it's such an awesome city because, for example, you will see brand new cell phone ads displayed on buildings crumbling with mildew. There are also many vibrant colours, including bright orange buddhist robes tied up like flags on branches of trees growing out of the city streets.
After a long ride of observing these sites from my window and absorbing the sound of the constant horn-honking we finally arrived to a community center in the village. The lady in the center told us that the women of the town built it in 1978 after being trained in carpentry. This is now the place where the women in the village work, making recycled paper from scraps. We asked where they got the money for the machinery (there's more involved in this paper process than you'd think) and that's when we found out it was CIDA that helped them get started! Andy and I wanted to buy some cards and such that they made and my stuff came to about 1.75 Cdn so I left 5 and same with Andy. The lady said that she wanted us to know that the extra money will go to the community. I wanted to give her all my money right then & there but decided instead that I would get their contact info so that if anyone back home wants to order more (the cards are 40 cents) then I will order a bigger batch by mail.
Next, we met our host family and it did not take long to see there was going to be a serious communication problem. They probably knew about 5 words in English combined and pretty much all we had remembered from our language training was Ayubowan. Luckily we had Andy's trusty Sinhala guide though so we set to work trying to make simple conversation. It was tough. In the first hour the only ground that was covered was that we could all agree that pineapple was hari rasi (very tasty).
I was expecting the worst but we actually had a bed to sleep in (Dibilee gave hers up and slept on the floor) and they had a solar heated lights! The people were unreal welcoming- all smiles & laughter throughout th evening as they served us snacks, then tea, then snacks, then dinner. We were very impressed during the snacking period to discover that they had the equivalent of timbits and blue pancakes! In true Sri Lankan style, we were served first and the lady came back to force feed us many times. It's rude to your plate always seems full. I keep patting my belly to say "I'm full" but we discovered quickly that to them it means "I'm fat." Which is not an insult here because as we all know, it is only in over consuming cultures like ours where thinness in valued. The lady of the house was quite big and she kept laughing about it- saying (through charades) that she took up the entire picture. There daughter was also what we would consider heavy set butsay no so you just have to eat very slowly so that they would not comprehend how eating too much is something to look down upon. Even their actors and models have healthy, round faces.
Yesterday I woke up early and hung out with the girl, Dibilee, showing her how to take pictures and such. Then I sat down and just took it all in- the palm trees, the crickets, the lifestyle. Watching the father and daughter having so much fun- he, laughing as he walks the cow and she, wading her feet in the stream- both just playing in like young children. Realizing that it was not the once a year camping exursion that we do at home (if that) but that it was their life, was pretty inspiring. If you looked at their clay house with no paint or carpet or toilet or electricity you might think that they were poor. But not even close. Dibilee may have liked my camera but she didn't really care if she had one, the father may have liked to work less but I didn't see him complain, the mother may not have turned down a new pair of shoes but she probably didn't see a problem with the ones she had.
I'm not trying to incite an old cliche about money & happiness but just trying to explain that they simply were not poor in their lives. In fact, before we left we were watching the neighbour make coconut key chains which he does as a business in his free time. After making one he handed it to us each one as a gift and would not athink thatccept payment. We didn't push it too much because perhaps that would be insulting to associate my money, useless in a largely subsistent community, with his present from the heart. I did tell him, though, that I would love to order more so I will try to make the connection before I leave. They would normally charge 80 cents which is still ridiculously cheap- even at Ten Thousand Villages it would probably cost at least $5.00.
In the afternoon we went fishing and because the sun burns so much more intensely up here, everyone had a good laugh at sudunoona (white lady) because one of my arms burned red.The people were so sad to see us go. The mother kept doing the signal for "I'm going to cry." It was sad to go but they said they will send the daughter to Canada when she gets older I will send something Candian (I'm thinking maple syrup) and the photos when I get back home.